“I regard myself as the most wretched of all men, stinking and covered with sores, and as one who has committed all sorts of crimes against his King. Overcome by remorse, I confess all my wickedness to Her, ask Her pardon, and abandon myself entirely to Her to do with as She will. But this King, filled with goodness and mercy, far from chastising me, lovingly embraces me, makes me eat at Her table, serves me with Her own hands, gives me the keys of Her treasures, and treats me as Her favorite. She talks with me and is delighted with me in a thousand and one ways; She forgives me and relieves me of my principal bad habits without talking about them; I beg Her to make me according to Her heart and always the more weak and despicable I see myself to be, the more beloved I am of Her.”
― Brother Lawrence, The Practice of the Presence of God
In Her Arms
My experience of the one I knew as a child, whom I now name Sacred, Creator, Reality, Mother, Father, Great, or Holy Spirit, not only denies PSAT because of Her lavish practice of forgiveness but loves me without reserve and holds me safely, close to her breast, in her loving embrace, permanently, forever, tirelessly, though I journeyed through times of peace and through times of suffering; through faithfulness and moral failure.
I should point out that her Love for me is no indication of how lovable I am. I do not work at being perfect but at being alive and present. Perfection has never been Her expectation of me. When Brother Lawrence explained his relationship to ‘sin,’ he said,
“I have learned to pick up forgiveness as easily as one picks up a straw from the ground, and then, I give myself no further trouble over it.”
—Brother Lawrence, The Practice of the Presence of God
His goal was not perfection either, but relationship, as is Hers, and he was secure in the forgiveness of the Holy One for his lack, like when he became focused on a single thing other than the unity of all things. He simply received the forgiveness that already was. Built into the relationship She envisioned with the human-kind.
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This beautiful teaching of Rabbi Jesus is recorded in Luke 7:47. The context is the home of Simon the Pharisee. Mary (presumably Magdalen) washes his feet with her tears, dries them with her hair, and anoints them with oil. There are two distinctly different translations of this verse, depending on the motive of the translator. The first is:
“Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” (ESV)
Suppose you endorse the ‘Yahwist’ creation narrative (Genesis 2:5-3:24: you endorse original sin). In that case, the ESV and others are likely to appeal to you because it is transactional, as you imagine your relationship to god to be. If I perform in such a way (with Love)—god will respond in this way (forgiveness). So…Mary loves, and because she loves, she is forgiven.
• • •
But the Beloved has not bound us to Herself with the fine print of a contract …She has bound us to Herself in a Loving relationship that does not demand our perfection to enjoy Her fully, and since She is Jesus-like, forgiveness for Her is not optional, it is systemic, so that the entire tree might be nourished by the fertilizer injected into the ground at its roots. (Matthew 6:14-15.) Forgiveness was Her first thought after birthing the human-kind. We were birthed into forgiveness. Please let that thought soak in.
So, Jesus says:
“I tell you, then, the great love she has shown proves that her many sins have been forgiven. But whoever has been forgiven little shows only a little love.”
—Luke 7:47, GNT
If you endorse the’ Priestly’ creation narrative because of your mystic experience of Her Love (Genesis 1:1-2:4: you endorse original blessing), the above translation from the GNT (and others) will appeal to you. You were never alienated from Her and were never beyond the reach of Her desire for you. In this translation, already forgiven, Mary is, as Brother Lawrence believed he was, free to Love as all the human-kind is.
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Pass,
Please re-read our Rabbis’ parable of the prodigal son, and please notice the complete absence of transaction and how that makes you feel. Not even a suggestion that his son might try to be a better boy! The Father gets nothing but his son, who was lost, in return for his total forgiveness. Not even a hint of righteous satisfaction that his boy finally ‘saw the light.’ The Father’s entire response is a ring, new shoes, new clothes and a great party!
Paul wrote, “There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.” And “we are all in Christ Jesus.” The Holy Spirit is not threatening us with condemnation or expulsion from Her presence because we are a disappointment. Her love is unconditional without exception, and forgiveness is right now and always. And, no, there is nothing we can do to make her love us more, and “there is nothing we can do to make her love us less.” And, I am not afraid of an intolerant, disappointed god whose feelings were hurt or whether or not I am “saved.”